Better than the original ? Here are 10 remakes which bombed in Bollywood  

Coolie No. 1 reiterates the one golden rule of cinema. Never do a remake of a bad film. So, which is the worst remake of all times? Is it Ram Gopal Varma Ki Aag? Or Sajid Khan’s Himmatwala or Satish Kaushik’s Karzzzz (zzzzzz…)? Or how about a rehash of French film called Giggle, Nautanki Saala?

Ram Gopal Varma Ki Aag: Need anything more be said? The indefatigable RGV has himself said it was a mistake to remake Sholay. That was later when the critics fell on him like a ton of bricks. Back then Ramu said confidently, “People don’t know what I’m making, so they’re just reacting nostalgically. Everyone from Jayaji and Dharamji to my other well-wishers have advised me to stay away from Sholay. Dharamji has apparently said he’d jump off that water tank if I messed up with Sholay. Why should he jump off ? He should push me off that tank if I mess up with Sholay.

“This is such a larger-than-life story, everyone has to be many sizes larger than life. You’ll feel his viciousness. All these years Mr Bachchan has hidden his evil side so well. I want to bring it out on screen. How can anyone be so correct? No one can be so morally perfect. If Allah, Jesus Christ and Vaishno Devi come together to plead against my redoing Sholay, I’m still making it. Aage jo hoga woh dekha jayega.” Well, Ramu we all know what happened. Moral of the story: Never tamper with a classic.

Mela: Dharmesh Darshan’s brutal and bizarre remake of Nasir Hussain’s bubbly and breezy Caravan with dollops of Sholay. While Aamir and his real-life brother Faizal played Jai and Veeru from Sholay, Twinkle Khanna, in what was supposed to be her makeover movie a la Karisma in Raja Hindustani, played the runaway girl that Asha Parekh played in Caravan. The hotchpotch was indigestible to say the least. Twinkle has hilarious off-the-record anecdotes to tell about Dharmesh’s neurotic direction. “Tina, aur emotion daalo,” he would scream. Poor Twinkle. She couldn’t get enough “emotion” in. Dharmesh got an emotional voice to dub her lines

Main Prem Ki Deewani Hoon: Sooraj Barjatya’s remake of Basu Chatterjee’s Chit Chor took the three simple rustic characters from the original to the Alps and the Niagara Falls and only gawd knows where else. Hrithik and Kareena hammed it up, trying to look likea couple in love. Abhishek Bachchan tried to keep a straight face. “What a mess they made of my film,” Basu da sighed. We agreed.

Main Aisa Hi Hoon: Harry Baweja took on the Sean Penn starrer I Am Sam about an autistic man’s bonding with his daughter. Kya joke maara! The camera shook and shook, probably to express the rage we felt while watching this hideous unauthorized remake. Watch the Tamil maverick Vikram do I Am Sam in Nanna, if you must watch a desi remake. Vikram was as good as Sean. Devgan really shouldn’t go anywhere near remakes: Ramu’s Sholay, Sajid’s Himmatwala and Harry’s Autistic I Am Khan...Sorry I Am Sam complete Devgan’s trio of embarrassments.

Karzzzz: Himesh Reshamiyya dared to do what Ranbir said he wouldn’t. Do a remake of Rishi Kapoor’s Karz, while Urmila Matondkar stepped into Simi Garewal’s part of the vixen murderess. This film made us think murderous thoughts about the theme of reincarnation. Satish Kaushik, who directed the disastrous remake says, “No Matter how good the remake, it can never compare with the original.” We agree. But this remake was an insult to the original.

Dayavan: Kamal Haasan still seethes when reminded of this seedy remake of his all-time classic Nayagan. Feroz Khan cast Vinod Khanna as the real-life gangster Varadarajan Mudaliar. Forget about matching up to the mighty Kamal, Vinod didn’t even make an effort to get there. Today the film is remembered only for its long torrid smooch between a visibly comfortable Khanna and a distinctly uneasy Madhuri Dixit. Apparently, Mani Ratnam was so upset with the remake that he contemplated suing.Eventually, he just did what all creative people do. Go on with his work.

Himmatwala: Ho tacky ho tacky ho tacky tacky re...Sridevi made a valid point when she wondered why anyone would want to remake Himmatwala as it wasn’t Mughal-e-Azam. I am sure everyone saw her point after the remake was released.Why remake a bad film, so badly?

Victoria 203: Anant Mahadevan is one of our most underrated directors. The search for success spurred this sensitive director of such sublime films as Staying Alive and Sindhutao Sapkal to remake one of the zaniest comic capers of the 1950s about a diamond heist. Alas, Anupam Kher and Om Puri just couldn’t match the saucy antics of Ashok Kumar and Pran from the original. And there was no Saira Banu in a towel crooning Thoda se thehro.

Aapko Pehle Bhi Kahin Dekha Hai: Anubhav Sinha’s remake of Jay Roach’s Meet the Parents was so bad, we laughed at all the wrong places. If it’s any consolation this Anubhav monster-piece is marginally better than what he did many years later in Ra.One.

Aatank Hi Aatank: Everyone from Feroz Khan to Mani Rathnam to Ram Gopal Varma has done Francis Copola’s The Godfather. But this one directed by Dilip Shankar takes the cake. Aamir Khan’s Brando act in an ill-fitting wig would serve as a telling indication that even God (read: AK) makes mistakes. This one was a blunder.